DeTomaso Mailing List: March 98, Message #212
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From: Swervedriver <wideopen@fred.net> Subject: Mailing list humor. No DeTomaso Content. Date: Thu, 5 Mar 1998 09:22:34 +0000 DeTomaso Mailing List: March 98, Message #212
<<<>> Q: How many list subscribers does it take to change a light bulb? A: 1,331: 1 to change the light bulb and to post to the list that the light bulb has been changed. 14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently. 7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs. 27 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light bulbs. 53 to flame the spell checkers 156 to write to the list administrator complaining about the light bulb discussion and its inappropriateness to this mail list. 41 to correct spelling in the spelling/grammar flames. 109 to post that this list is not about light bulbs and to please take this email exchange to alt.lite.bulb 203 to demand that cross posting to alt.grammar, alt.spelling and alt.punctuation about changing light bulbs be stopped. 111 to defend the posting to this list saying that we all use light bulbs and therefore the posts **are** relevant to this mail list. 306 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique, and what brands are faulty. 27 to post URLs where one can see examples of different light bulbs 14 to post that the URLs were posted incorrectly, and to post corrected URLs. 3 to post about links they found from the URLs that are relevant to this list which makes light bulbs relevant to this list. 33 to summarize all posts to date, then quote them including all headers and footers, and then add "Me Too." 12 to post to the list that they are unsubscribing because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy. 19 to quote the "Me Too's" to say, "Me Three." 4 to suggest that posters request the light bulb FAQ. 1 to propose new alt.change.lite.bulb newsgroup. 47 to say this is just what alt.physic.cold_fusion was meant for, leave it here. 143 votes for alt.lite.bulb. <end> I, who should have know better, posted a followup of a few bits I thought were missing from the list You forgot a few: 27 to post in HTML because they are using the IE or Netscape that had it turned on by default and are too clueless to look 48 to complain about the HTML posts 27 to post 'sorry I didn't realize it was on' -- in HTML 96 to complain about more HTML and post detailed instructions on how to change the setting 58 to mumble something about using a web browser to read mail 12 MIME posts with useless colors and bolds saying thanks for the help with the HTML mail 1 to post a GIF/JPG of the lightbulb hanging too close to their digital camera. 1 complaint from the guy using /usr/ucb/Mail who wants to know what the *@&(%$!@ has been going on 58 to complain about the binary post 74 to say they liked the binary and didn't mind it 1 post about how you can MAKE MONEY FAST!!!!! by selling lightbulbs and this report available for only $5. 1328 to reply to the list with the full spam attached and then put 'remove' at the end 3 to flame the other morons for replying to the spammer and CCing the list 1 from the list admin notifying that the list is looking for a bigger server to handle the load There have now been several followups: "How did I get on this list?" "How do I get off this list?" "REMOVE" "REMOVE UNSUB SIGNOFF REMOVE TAKE ME OFF THIS LIST" "unsubribe" [sic] "Morons, you have to send it to the majordomo address" "How am I supposed to know that?" If it wasn't so pitiful, it would be funny. Submitted by: Timothy J. Luoma @ peak.org \\|// (o o) ORACLE SERVICE HUMOR MAILING LIST ------------oOOo-(_)-oOOo----------------------------------------------- HOW DO I SUBSCRIBE? It's free! Just send a message to oracle-humor-subscribe@lyris.oraclehumor.com WHERE DO I SEND JOKES? WHERE'S THE WEBSITE? jokes@oraclehumor.com http://www.oraclehumor.com LEGAL STUFF: Wallaby Solutions runs this piece as submitted and does not claim to own any copyright privileges to it. The work was submitted to us as an item for the mailing list, and it was posted solely on the basis of its quality. If this is an administrative posting, then follow any copyright guidelines noted on the posting. ADVERTISERS: Reach over 69,000 people. Write to ad-info@lyris.oraclehumor.com for automated information or check out http://oraclehumor.com/Wallaby/ ------------------------------------------------------------------------ This message came to you via Lyris list server software. http://lyris.com To unsubscribe, forward this message to oracle-humor-unsubscribe@lyris.oraclehumor.com You are subscribed at [wideopen@bigdog.fred.net]. ------------------------------------------------------------------------