DeTomaso Mailing List: June 99, Message #170

Not one who desires to Spam the site with non technical input, I couldn't
help but provide this after the recent speed trap discussions:


>> Bob, a lawyer, was driving home over the Golden Gate Bridge after
spending> a great day out on the ocean fishing.> His catch, cleaned and
filleted, was wrapped in newspaper on the passenger> side floor.> He was
late getting home and was speeding...> Wouldn't you know, a cop jumped out,
radar gun in hand, motioned him to> the side of the bridge.> Bob pulled over
like a good citizen.>> The cop walked up to the window and said, "You know
how fast you were> going, BOY?"> Bob thought for a second and said, "Uhh,
60?"> 67 mph, son!> 67 mph in a 55 zone!" said the cop.>> "But if you
already knew, officer" replied Bob, "Why did you ask me?"> Fuming over Bob's
answer, the officer growled, in his normal sarcastic> fashion, "That's
speeding, and you're getting a ticket and a fine!"> The cop took a good
close look at Bob, in his stained fishing attire and> said, "You don't even
look like you have a job! Why, I've never seen> anyone so scruffy in my
entire life!">> Bob answered, "I've got a job! I have a good, well-paying
job!"> The cop leaned in the window, smelling Bob's fish catch, said, "What
kind> of a job would a bum like you have?"> > "I'm a rectum stretcher!"
replied Bob.> "What you say, BOY?" asked the patrolman.>> "I'm a rectum
stretcher!" The cop, scratching his head, asked, "What does> a rectum
stretcher do?"> Bob explained, "People call me up and say they need to be
stretched, so I> go over to their house.> I start with a couple of fingers,
then a couple more, and then on whole> hand, then two.> Then I slowly pull
them farther and farther apart until it's a full six> feet across.">> The
cop, absorbed with these bizarre images in his mind, asked, "What the> hell
do you do with a six foot asshole?"> Bob nonchalantly answered, "You give it
a radar gun and stick it at the> end of a bridge!"