DeTomaso Mailing List: October 2000, Message #42

Here we go Tricky Ricky....... i'm sure if you had looked more closely at my 
lovely European bumper,  you'd have read mine more accurately:
Please note correction's.......

From: Rick Moseley <moseleya@pacbell.net>
Subject: Women's bumper stickers...  (NO Pantera content)
Date: Sun, 1 Oct 2000 12:20:27 -0400
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I think I saw a couple of these on Ms.(Ferrari)Basile's car 
 WOMEN'S BUMPER STICKERS
 
 
 1.   SO MANY MEN, SO FEW WHO CAN AFFORD ME.
Correction: So many men, so few who repair my cars and make my Pantera 
fuel-injected.

 2.  GOD MADE US SISTERS, PROZAC MADE US FRIENDS.
God made us sisters, no wonder I have no sex.

 3.  IF THEY DON'T HAVE CHOCOLATE IN HEAVEN, I AIN'T GOING.
Correction: If they don't have Speedvision in heaven, I ain't going.


 4.  MY MOTHER IS A TRAVEL AGENT FOR GUILT TRIPS.
Correction: My TPR President is a travel agent for guilt trips.

 5.  PRINCESS, HAVING HAD SUFFICIENT EXPERIENCE WITH
 PRINCES, SEEKS FROG.
Correction: Princess, having had sufficient experience with frogs, seeks a 
dog or hairier pet.

 6.  COFFEE, CHOCOLATE, MEN ... SOME THINGS ARE JUST
 BETTER RICH.
Correction: Only coffee, chocolate and parmesian cheese are good, rich and 
aged.... Men can be poor if young (hehehe  : )

 7.  DON'T TREAT ME ANY DIFFERENTLY THAN YOU WOULD
 THE QUEEN.
Correction: You better treat me even better than the KING.

 8.  IF YOU WANT BREAKFAST IN BED, SLEEP IN THE
 KITCHEN.
Correction: If you want breakfast in bed, crawl in and spend the night 
detailing my engine compartment.

 9.  DINNER IS READY WHEN THE SMOKE ALARM GOES OFF.
Correction: I wake up when the smoke alarm (connected to my alarm clock) goes 
off.

 10. I'M OUT OF ESTROGEN - AND I HAVE A GUN.
Correction:  I tried estrogen once....but I got so blown up (no gun 
necessary).......certain articles of woman's clothing aren't made even nearly 
big enough.

 11. GUYS HAVE FEELINGS TOO. BUT LIKE...WHO CARES?
Correction: Guys have feelings too; who cares!     (despite my 
logistics.....i do not speak with valley girl colloquialisms).

 12. NEXT MOOD SWING: 6 MINUTES
Correction:  I have no swings; i am consistently obnoxious.

 13. AND YOUR POINT IS?
Correction: I'm curious... do you have a point?  Can I see it?

 14. WARNING: I HAVE AN ATTITUDE AND I KNOW HOW TO
 USE IT.
Correction:  I have an attitude and it's reflected in my driving.

 15. OF COURSE I DON'T LOOK BUSY...I DID IT RIGHT
 THE FIRST TIME.
Correction: Of course I don't look Ditsy, you people are just not used to 
WOMEN.

 16. DO NOT START WITH ME.  YOU WILL NOT WIN.
Correction: Go ahead.. start with me... I'm used to a 12 yr. old mentality.

 17. YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO REMAIN SILENT, SO PLEASE
 SHUT UP.
Correction: Everyone has the right to speak, even yell, even use capitals.. 
except Tony Digiovanni... he has to shut up.

 18. ALL STRESSED OUT AND NO ONE TO CHOKE.
Correction: All stressed out.. need another car.

 19. I'M ONE OF THOSE BAD THINGS THAT HAPPEN TO GOOD
 PEOPLE.
Correction: You're all some of the best things that have happened to me and I 
hope I can someday return the favors.

 20. HOW CAN I MISS YOU IF YOU WON'T GO AWAY?
Correction: How can I miss you if you take me with you?

 21. SORRY IF I LOOKED INTERESTED.  I'M NOT.
Correction: If you see me with that special "look"...most probably I am 
interested and documenting notes for my journal on dysfunctional behavior.

 22. IF WE ARE WHAT WE EAT, I'M FAST, CHEAP AND  EASY.
Correction: If we are what we date... i'm fast, cheap and most difficult.

 23. DON'T UPSET ME!  I'M RUNNING OUT OF PLACES TO
 HIDE THE BODIES.
Correction: Wanna know what really upsets me.... I'm running out of parking 
places.